Brandon Bays on Emotional Freedom
Author of "The Journey"
We so often have the misconception that our
emotions interfere with our experience of ultimate peace: that
they are the storm that distracts us from the spacious calm. They
seem to limit our experience of freedom and obscure the
boundless field of grace, which by nature is vast, free and
emotionless.
We learned at an early age that there were ‘good’
emotions and ‘bad’ emotions.
We learned that ‘bad’ emotions weren’t welcome and
that only ‘good’ ones were allowed. If we felt fearful, shameful,
hurt or angry, we were taught to cover it all up, push through and
be strong.
Pretty soon, any strong emotion arising
caused an instantaneous shut down and cover up, as we quickly
tried to transmute it into something more comfortable to society.
Even if we secretly sequestered ourselves away we would often
fight back the tears, try to talk ourselves out of what we were
feeling or diminish its importance, and maybe even felt ashamed of
our weakness in the process.
Emotions became our invitation to go to battle. The
instant anything arose that we or society felt was too emotional,
all our strategies to annihilate, deny, or transmute it arose … we
fought it, resisted it, tried to explain it away; we argued with
it, projected it and blamed others for it, blamed ourselves for
feeling it, and ultimately started to develop more long-term
strategies for suppression. We took up smoking, drinking alcohol,
overeating, senseless television watching, endless reading of just
about anything; all in an effort to narcotize and put to sleep any
and all so-called unacceptable emotions that might dare to raise
their heads and try to destroy our peace.
Emotions became the culprits to be destroyed before
they destroyed us.
Indeed, everywhere we look, in every context of
society, secular or religious; it seems that all of life is
conspiring to kill our emotions, to suppress our natural feelings.
It seems nearly everyone agrees with the culturally conditioned
belief that most emotions are bad and must be subdued at all
costs.
It’s no wonder we can’t experience peace for any
length of time. We are always on the battlefield, fighting wars
against the enemy – an enemy that won’t give us any rest. It’s a
battle we all fight, even though we know it’s one we will never
win.
For as long as we have breath in our bodies, and
have life in our being, emotions will come as a natural part of
being human. It’s as if we are fighting our very selves, our own
nature. And what a fruitless, endless battle it is. We can’t stop
the force and any resistance only drains your energy and exhausts
your being. When so much effort is wasted trying to resist the
natural flow of life, there is not much life force left to
experience the inherent joy of life.
It’s our very resistance to what is that
destroys our peace, robs us of fulfillment – not the ‘negative’
emotion itself, but the struggle against it.
We have become warriors: warriors fighting a
phantom enemy called emotion. And when the battle becomes too much
we collapse into depression, into a place of numbness and we seek
counselors or doctors and psychiatrists who prescribe drugs to
block out our intense feelings. Or we engage in pointless and
mind-numbing activities to distract us from our feelings –
watching vacuous television game shows, washing the car, vacuuming
the carpets when they’re already clean, gambling, endless gossip–
all in a game of emotional avoidance. Or we temporarily raise the
white flag and plead for mercy: we turn to God and start to pray.
We go to an enlightened master, meditate, or recite mantras. At
best, we get a short window of peace before the next battle
begins.
It never occurs to
us to drop the role of warrior; to cease the battle altogether.
Maybe we all just need a change of profession.
Maybe we weren’t cut out to be soldiers in battle, fighting
against life. It’s just that no one ever gave us another job
opportunity – they didn’t offer us an alternative choice. But what
if you decided not to play the game of war? What then? …
What if you gave up all resistance? What if you simply refused to
fight?
What if, instead, you said, ‘Come one, come all.
All of my emotions are welcome into the ocean of love that is
always here?’ What if, instead of a battlefield, it was discovered
that life is an infinite field – a field of trust, openness, and
love?
And what if, in this infinite field, all the
natural flow of life’s feelings were free to come and go? What if
you provided no resistance whatsoever to the natural flow of life?
That which you resist persists.
Your resistance to emotion is perpetuating the very
thing you wish was not there. It’s in the moment of true
surrender, openness and acceptance that your emotions feel so
welcome that they easily come, and just as easily go. Resistance
keeps your emotions in play and creates only more of itself.
Resistance begets resistance.
It’s time to call off the fight and welcome your
enemy with open arms. When you lay down your shield of protection
and look this so-called ‘enemy’ in the eyes, you will see yourself
shining there. You are looking into the eyes of a friend and that
friend is your Self.
The invitation is to finally lay down your arms,
dear one, and welcome all of life with all your heart. Your old
enemy will turn out to be your closest friend, and the only enemy
still at large will be realized to be resistance itself.
The time has come to befriend your emotions. They
are the gateway to your Self. They are the gateway to freedom.
Based on the
book Freedom Is. Copyright
2006 by
Manifest Abundance Limited. Reprinted with permission of New
World Library, Novato, CA.
www.newworldlibrary.com
or 800-972-6657 ext. 52.
Fall
2007
The Journey
Event Calendar
September
Toronto,
ON--WITH
SKIP LACKEY
15th & 16th Journey Intensive
17th Advanced Skills
Detroit,
MI--WITH
SKIP LACKEY
22nd Toronto, ON & 23rd Journey Intensive
24th Advanced Skills
New
Jersey
--WITH SKIP LACKEY
29th & 30th Journey Intensive
Oct. 1st Advanced Skills
Salt
Lake City,
UT--WITH JOEL
YOUNG
29th & 30th Journey Intensive
Oct. 1st Advanced Skills
October
Salt Lake City,
UT--WITH JOEL
YOUNG
29th & 30th Journey Intensive
Oct. 1st Advanced Skills
Portland,
OR--WITH JOEL
YOUNG
6th & 7th Journey Intensive
8th Advanced Skills
South
Florida--WITH JOEL
YOUNG
13th & 14th Journey Intensive
15th Advanced Skills
Calgary,
AB--WITH SKIP
LACKEY
13th & 14th Journey Intensive
15th Advanced Skills
San
Francisco,
CA--WITH SKIP
LACKEY
20th & 21th Journey Intensive
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Ottawa,
ON
27th & 28th
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Intensive
with
Brandon Bays
29th Advanced Skills
WITH SKIP LACKEY
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November
Colorado
3rd & 4th
Journey Intensive
with
Brandon Bays
5th Advanced Skills WITH SKIP LACKEY
Saskatoon,
SK--with
SKIP LACKEY
17th & 18th Journey Intensive
19th Advanced Skills
December
New York,
NY
1st & 2nd Journey Intensive
22th Advanced Skills
Location TBA
7th &9th
Manifest Abundance
with
Brandon Bays
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